For many, feelings are still raw after the presidential election, which could make for some difficult conversations during the holidays. So, experts in productive conversation have a few tips to help survive the season with relationships intact.
Parisa Parsa, executive director of the company Essential Partners noted that you can only control your side of the conversation. She suggests you start by asking yourself a few questions.
She asks, "Why do you want to connect? What do you hope to learn? Are you ready to be in a grounded enough place to resist angry outbursts? And are you willing to try to understand or will you feel the need to persuade or get them to concede, on points of disagreement?"
If someone else gets on their soapbox, and you choose to participate in the conversation anyway, she suggests approaching them in an open, caring and curious way. Parsa noted that people on each side of an issue often come "armed" with their own set of facts, and studies have shown that giving them more information rarely changes anyone's mind. Still, you can't have a full relationship without talking through tough issues, she adds.
Joan Blades, a partner in the website livingroomconversations.org, said society as a whole benefits when people on opposite sides of the spectrum make an effort to really listen to each other.
"When we fail to talk to people with different viewpoints and just talk to people that think like us, we actually make our own viewpoints more extreme," she explained. "It's really helpful when we have a shared narrative."
Blades said conversations flourish when people follow the rules they learned in kindergarten: be respectful, take turns and be responsible for your part of the discussion.
The late psychologist Marshall Rosenberg developed a globally recognized four-step approach to nonviolent communications: "Observe & recap," "Describe emotions, not positions," "Identify needs," and "Make a request."
Rosenberg's work is widely taught and shared through the Center for Nonviolent Communication; another rich source for information is the National Coalition for Dialogue & Deliberation.
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North Dakota's June 11 primary is inching closer and those running for legislative seats are trying to win over voters, including Native American candidates who are part of a movement energized by newly drawn political boundaries.
The organization North Dakota Native Vote said there are seven candidates with Indigenous roots seeking spots in the Legislature. Most are running in District 9, which was recently updated to reflect representation needs for two Native American tribes.
Natasha Gourd, a board member of North Dakota Native Vote, described them as a good mixture of candidates coming from both reservations in the area, with some running as Democrats and others as Republicans.
"We've seen an upturn in participation and just getting leadership development through Native candidates," Gourd observed.
The election wave comes after the state saw 10 Native candidates in legislative races two years ago. For her group, Gourd acknowledged the boost can be tricky because they cannot endorse everyone running. But she noted having greater assurances the areas will be represented by people from their community -- no matter if they have a different stance on certain issues -- is still a positive.
Gourd added trying to build on the momentum is also important for off-reservation districts.
"What they do at the state level, regardless of Native American people in North Dakota (being part of) federally recognized tribes, it does affect us," Gourd pointed out. "Most Natives in North Dakota do live off the reservation, so it does affect our populations."
Gourd stressed they need more Native voices at the state level speaking out about priorities within education, the housing crisis, energy issues and health care. She hopes the positive trends they're seeing inspire more civic participation among other racial and ethnic groups trying to get a seat at the policy table in North Dakota.
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A new poll finds a near 20-year low in the number of voters who say they have a high interest in the 2024 election, with a majority saying they hold negative views of both President Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump. A group of Arizona elections officials and experts recently gathered to discuss the growing discontent with the state's current electoral landscape.
Stephen Richer, Maricopa County Recorder, said that if politicians are what he calls "single-minded seekers of re-election," he contends the state should change the political incentive structure.
"And if those incentives will change, then maybe we will be talking about more things in the Arizona Voter's Agenda and less things that are currently right now incentivized by what I still believe to be a minority, but a very passionate, very loud, and a minority that is definitely committed to acting on those issues," he said.
Richer added it is important to remember that despite Independent and unaffiliated voters being able to participate in the July 30th statewide primary, they were excluded from the state's March Presidential Preference Election, and that has caught the eye of some in the state. The bipartisan group Make Elections Fair Arizona is pushing for open primaries, but proponents of closed primaries believe they're crucial to maintaining the integrity of party ideals.
Amanda Burke, executive vice president with the non-partisan, nonprofit organization Center for the Future of Arizona, said more than half of unaffiliated voters do not feel they have leaders or candidates running who speak to the issues and causes they care about. She contends that then translates to who decides to show up at the ballot box and vote, and encourages Arizonans to imagine a different primary system if they want different outcomes.
"Otherwise we are going to continue to have some more outcomes in terms of people who are incentivized to speak to a small percentage of their base on either side who are really not representative of the larger views," she explained.
The Grand Canyon State allows voter-initiated amendments to the state constitution, but the Arizona Require Partisan Primary Elections Amendment would add the state's current primary practice to the state constitution, prohibiting future changes without another constitutional amendment. Make Elections Fair Arizona is still collecting signatures to get its measure on the November ballot.
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Wisconsin women have made progress in closing gaps when it comes to being elected to public office.
But some voices worry the movement might slow down as candidates see increasing levels of threats and harassment.
The Brennan Center for Justice recently issued findings that detail the threatening behavior those in the political arena are experiencing now.
Women were three to four times as likely as men to experience abuse targeting their gender.
Erin Vilardi, CEO and founder of the advocacy and assistance group Vote Run Lead, said this creates more unfairness in areas such as resource planning for a campaign.
"We see women candidates and incumbents right now having to pay for security," said Vilardi, "having to put in their budgets, in their campaign funds, in their line-items for their campaigns a security detail."
And Vilardi said because of the worsening climate, the threats are extending to almost all other candidates, including conservative white men.
She and other researchers called on party leaders to strongly condemn political violence. They also recommend that each state implement stronger protection for officeholders.
Vilardi said it's not just women candidates and incumbents having to deal with this behavior. Women working as top aides and political journalists are subject to more hateful rhetoric these days.
"This is something that permeates women in politics," said Vilardi, "not just for the folks that are stepping up to lead but for the ecosystem of women around them."
And if more women decide not to run or seek re-election as a result, Vilardi said this means there will be fewer opportunities for gender equality in leadership positions in state legislatures and Congress.
She urged constituents to send messages of support to women officeholders as they weigh these challenges and their political futures.
Support for this reporting was provided by the Carnegie Corporation of New York.
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